The divorce rate is shocking. But when you find yourself divorced in your 50s, it’s easy to get overwhelmed with the thought of dating again. Here, we’ll explore several sure-fire ways to navigate dating in your 50s after divorce.
After a divorce, men and women in their 50s should join dating apps, and also not be afraid to approach people in their gym, church, or local coffee shops. But it’s also key to wait about a year following the divorce before beginning to date.
And, of course, also focus on being the best version of yourself that you can be.
And learn to be happy on your own and to truly be over your ex before you start dating. If you still have energy towards your ex (positive or negative), then you aren’t still over them yet and should hold off on dating. In this article, we’ll focus on the key things to do to ensure that starting future relationships is easy.
Let’s dive right in.
Kanye West is reportedly back in the dating game following his separation from Kim Kardashian.
⁰How long should one wait before getting back on the dating game after a divorce?
Should there be a mourning period?
— Radio 2000 (@Radio2000_ZA) June 30, 2021
How long after a divorce should you date?
As a general rule, plan to wait to date until the divorce has been finalized and 10-12 months have passed from the initial separation. But the longer the marriage, or if your spouse initiated the divorce out of the blue, the longer you should wait.
As you know, divorce can be emotionally draining.
So, ideally, you want some time to fully process the experience — to mourn, be angry, be sad, grieve, and forgive yourself.
And above all, you want to draw insights from the failed marriage and all your past relationships. To be able to discern and learn from some of the patterns you observe and offer your potential partner a more mature you.
The important thing is to heal.
But you decide the timeline that’ll work for you. People are different. There are folks who do not need much time before they rejoin the dating scene.
In my case, my ex-wife dumped me in April of 2021 and it came as a total shock. By the following March our divorce was done and she was already in a serious relationship with her best guy friend of 7 years. I began dating almost a year after that initial dumping.
And there are those who need a lot of time before jumping into the dating pool again.
In this recent article, I get into more details about how long to stay single after a breakup. I explained why there’s no timer on how long to stay single after a breakup. I explored the reasons why some people move on faster than others and why it’s important to take the time to stay single after a breakup.
I even shared the findings of a study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences in the United States (PNAS).
Just click the link to read it on my site.
Time to show off that dazzling personality. https://t.co/Kr2brWo8Ie
— Mashable (@mashable) October 27, 2021
How do I meet a new partner in my fifties?
The following are some ways to meet a new partner in your fifties: using dating apps or sites for those over 50, going on blind dates, matchmaking services, connecting with others on social media, asking friends to introduce you to people who are interested in starting new relationships, and many others.
I am a 58-year-old guy, and I got dates primarily from:
I joined OKCupid too and spent a lot of time on it. I also really love how in-depth the interface is. But I never got a single date from it. I also tried Plenty of Fish but hated the interface and found it frustrating. I glanced at others but most required money to do almost anything and had mixed reviews.
Apart from online dating, you can also rely on friends, family, colleagues, or folks you hang out with to introduce you to a new person.
Tinder probably crossed your mind when I mentioned online dating above.
I’ll share more dating apps and sites in a bit. But in this recent article, I shared 249 simple Tinder bios for men. I use the app. It’s not just for younger folks.
There are bios if you’re a funny man, smart man, bios to leave a good impression, emotionally arousing pick-up lines, unique taglines to get the most matches, and even hilarious ones that would increase the odds you would get laid.
This is a great way to meet a new person and start your next relationship because those you’ll be introduced to have been pre-screened, as it were.
Let’s face it, dating now may feel daunting after years or decades of being with your spouse. But you’ll have to get out of your comfort zone and get in the game again.
This might entail putting more effort into some of your hobbies and going to places where you know you’re likely to meet other single people. It’s an easy way to meet single men and single women in a more relaxed setting. After all, you already have something in common.
You can also try matchmaking services after you’ve used the other methods and you’ve not found someone with the right mindset and habits you’re convinced are critical to forming a long-term relationship.
But I suggest that you ease into it. Don’t rush things. Don’t look for someone who will fill the void left by your ex. Have fun with it and get to know these new friends first.
Don’t assume that the first person you date is “the one”. Don’t think you have to find someone that would be perfect for the rest of your life in the first few dates!
So, you decide the right time you need before you go out there to find new love.
Nolan and Rebecca met on eharmony earlier this year just as stay-at-home orders were put into place. “Love finds a way, as it always does. Through lockdowns and face masks, Lysol, and shortages, this challenging time has affected so many people and family…” (1/2) pic.twitter.com/nVmppig94M
— eharmony (@eHarmony) January 29, 2021
Are people in their 50s on dating apps?
Yes. People in their 50s are on dating apps. According to 2020 Pew Research, 3 in 10 U.S. adults have used a dating app, and 16% of them are those who are 50 and above.
There are even sites and apps specifically made for older folks, such as Silver Singles.
Technology has changed the dating game. A considerable chunk of new relationships by those over 50 is started online now. The dating rules of the past are not so rigidly adhered to anymore.
Gone are the days when folks felt a bit embarrassed about meeting people online.
So, while you can still meet and interact with a lot of people offline, it’s almost expected now that the initial contact will be initiated online. It’s a “brave new world”, so be prepared to meet many potential dates online, especially on dating sites and apps. They’re easy to use.
The first thing would be to research some of the best sites and apps to know what each has to offer and the rules and then register an online dating profile on the ones you’re comfortable with.
The following are the best websites and dating apps out there:
- Our Time
- Silver Singles
- Christian Mingle
- Facebook Dating
It’s important to know what your goals are so that you can choose the site/app that would be best for you. Ideally, you want to ensure that the initial meetings are held in a public space.
There’s also the issue of security to be mindful of, especially for women.
Some experts suggest that online interaction should be minimal, seeing as the best way to know if they are the right person is when you meet them in the real world on a couple of dates. It’s easier to spot red flags offline.
But most women will not want to meet in person until they have some level of comfort. And most will want to meet you at a restaurant or other public place rather than the guy picking them up at their home.
So do plan on exchanging a few messages first to build trust and rapport. Sharing social media accounts so they can see you’re a “real” person also help. Then, it’s time to meet in person at a restaurant, bar, museum, or other public place.
Navigating online dating starts with having a great bio headline.
In this recent article, I shared 125 examples, neatly categorized into what each is trying to accomplish.
There are funny dating headlines, flirty dating headlines for Tinder and Bumble, romantic headlines for POF dating, and there are even nerdy references to use on Match.
Just click the link to read it on my site.
With so much sad news these days, I am happy to share with you all that my partner & I are getting married next month (with the encouragement of Customs & Immigration 🇨🇦). Love found us at age 50 and 71. 😘 pic.twitter.com/e0lb4mpPRh
— Janice Selbie (Wise Counsellor) (@Wise_counsellor) June 6, 2022
What are the odds of getting married after 50?
The odds of getting married after 50 are good.
It’s a tad counterintuitive, but older people are more likely to remarry compared to younger folks. In fact, 60% of divorced people over the age of 50 are more likely to remarry than those within the 18-35 age bracket.
When we think a bit about the stats, we see that it makes sense. Older people have time on their side. They are more likely to have been married before. “They’ve been there, done that.” In contrast, younger folks have not had similar experiences.
In addition to the above, societal norms have evolved, and folks are living longer. In the past, cohabitation was frowned upon, and older men and older women often remain unmarried after divorce or the death of a spouse.
Society used to be more puritanical, as divorce was seen as a tragedy. Thankfully, things have changed. Even children are more accepting of their divorced parents remarrying.
But according to bikellaw.com, the odds are not so favorable for Asians, Hispanics, and African-Americans. For example, while 60% of Caucasians have remarried, only 10% of Asians have taken the plunge again.
It also revealed that about 33% of men are willing to consider remarrying after a failed marriage, while only 15% of women think they will consider tying the knot again.
Is Tinder the best dating app for those over 50?
You’ve probably heard of Tinder and wondering if it works for divorced men over 50. In this recent article, I answered the question, shared dating tips for men over 50, and intimated you with some scams on the app.
But I also shared the best dating apps for older age groups and offered some advice around dating after divorce.
Just click the link to read it on my site.
Dating someone who has the same sense of humor as you >>>>> pic.twitter.com/eALA6NSwEN
— Best of Russell Crowe (@bestofcrowe) August 15, 2022
What do women in their 50s want in a man?
Women in their 50s want honesty, faithfulness, romance, friendship, kindness, fun, communication, and desire. They want a harmonious relationship and are not fastidious about whether the man has money.
Kindness and a sense of humor are key attributes they look for in a man.
Women in this age range are mature and have been robbed of the high expectations women in their 20s/30s may still harbor. If they have been married before, they place a premium on a partner who’s going to be faithful. Honesty and faithfulness are arguably the most vital attributes they look for in men.
They want a man who will sweep them off their feet with several romantic gestures. This would also entail having a lot of fun. And they love a man who can communicate his feelings and spend a long-time conversing with them.
Of course, they want a good-looking man, but put more stock in an intelligent, considerate, mature, emotionally intelligent man. They are not looking for a stud or an overly athletic man.
Unlike younger women who tend to be attracted to “bad boys”, older women prefer nice gentlemen.
They want a successful man. It’s probably a red flag if a man is still struggling in his 50s!
Do older men just want hot young girls?
There is a class of single men who aren’t interested in a serious relationship right away and are curious about how sugar relationships work. It’s not for everyone, but if you’re curious, you may enjoy reading a recent article I published.
I explained how a sugar partner type of relationship differs from a regular relationship.
I shared the average age of sugar daddies and sugar babies. I shared what sugar daddies do and how much sugar babies get paid.
I wrote about whether sugar babies can have “real” boyfriends. I even shared how sugar babies can make sugar daddies happy and what sugar daddies expect from a sugar baby.
Just click the link to read it on my site.
Mazel tov @JoJoFromJerz! I was divorced at age 49 and it was a day to celebrate. Life has so much to offer and the world is your oyster! You are beautiful and smart and have much to offer.
P.S. I met hubby #2 one and a half months after my divorce. pic.twitter.com/ZysiqaLYPZ
— Karen S. Slater – 🌻I stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦 (@KarenSSlater) September 19, 2022
Is there life after divorce at 50?
As I mentioned above, I got dumped in April of 2021 at the age of 56.
It came as a total surprise and shock. And in less than a year after, the divorce was final. And me and our 3 kids were left wondering what happened.
But I am here to say that there IS life after divorce.
Before beginning to date 1 woman exclusively as I am now, I went on about 12-15 dates with 8 women. Full disclosure, I even had sex with 3 of them.
In fact, out of all of those dates, only 2 of the women were ones I felt no connection with. I could easily have continued dating any of the other 6. That being said, I am very happy with my choice to only date 1 of them exclusively.
All of them were within a decade of my age (but all younger), with 1 of those women actually being more than 20 years younger.
I had a lot of fun dates and enjoyed the experience of getting back out there after being with my now ex-wife for 16 years.
So don’t be afraid to get out there, meet people, and have fun.
Don’t be in a rush to lock someone down, and really take your time to go out with a variety of people and really get clear on what you want for the long term.
And it’s OK to keep looking until you’re sure.
In the article, we looked at a variety of issues around dating after a divorce.
We got into how long you should wait after a divorce before you get started dating and some of the ways to meet a new partner in your 50s. We explored whether people in their 50s are on dating apps and the odds of getting married in one’s 50s.
Then, we looked at whether there will be a check to see if you are already married when you apply for a marriage license.
Lastly, we wrapped things up by looking at what men and women in their 50s are looking for in the opposite sex.